1 gender-flexible lead role
8 featured roles where singing is not required
Expandable, gender-flexible ensemble of kids

Could be played by an adult or an older child who can help to keep the pace of the dialogue moving; could be played by a woman or a man in drag; all musical lines (there aren't many) can be spoken if necessary

• MISS NELSON - sweet; kind; pretty; wears long flowy dresses in pastel colors (this long skirt will be used to hide the VIOLA SWAMP tights underneath)
• VIOLA SWAMP - mean; scary; ugly; wears yellow and green striped tights with a black dress and at least one removable accessory (pointed glasses, prosthetic nose, etc.)

The narrators; wear coveralls; can be played by boys or girls (if necessary, switch JOHNNY to JILLY and/or switch MURRAY to MILLY)

• POP HANSON - makes a popping sound when he says his name
• PENNY WHISTLER - whistles when her name is said
• JOHNNY BONES - does a hand-jive when his name is said
• MURRAY SNAPSBERG ("SNAPPY") - snaps when his name is said
• BUD - no sound effect

Bumbling; clumsy; inept detectives; can be played by boys or girls; dress like Sherlock Holmes - signature hats and capes, handle-bar mustaches, pipes, large magnifying glasses

• DETECTIVE McSMOGG - takes the lead
• DETECTIVE McSMOOG - the sidekick

The boring Principal; wears a pastel shirt, a funny tie/bowtie, and nerdy glasses; can be played by a boy or a girl (switch to MRS if necessary)

Can be cast gender-blind; all go by their own names (or a name they choose); wear pastels, as in the original book